Post updating you on the recent crazy Leann Rimes behavior.

I have a soft spot for Leanne Rimes. And by soft spot I mean she’s normally not on my radar, but she does so much crazy shit that I always want to write about her, even if you guys don’t care. It’s like how I am with John Mayer. I know 95% of my readers don’t care, BUT I CARE. So I write about him anyway. And I’m going to write about Leann because I love this crazy ho, and you should too.

I’m sure you know by now that she broke up the marriage of her now-husband Eddie Cibrian and his then-wife, Brandi Glanville. Brandi is now a pseudo Real Housewife (not a main cast member) of Beverly Hills, and was filmed back in June wearing this brown mesh bikini. I’m sure Leann has all kinds of insecurity issues, because LO AND BEHOLD she was spotted wearing the same exact bikini in pink on her birthday. Hmmmmmmmmm……how coincidental!

It’s predictable to me. Because Leanne used to be thicker. Not THICK. But thicker. Now she is skin and bones. But you know why she lost that weight, right? She’s determined to become Brandi 2.0 because she has convinced herself that is what her husband likes. And maybe it is? Tall rail-thin models. Which explains why she tweets pictures of herself in a bikini every 5 seconds, she wants to be a model, too! I’m not sure if she’s aware of how crazy she looks. Maybe it’s subconscious and she doesn’t realize she’s doing it, but… she’s still doing it. And it makes me sad. And by “sad” I mean really, really happy.

Moving on to different Leann news…

E! news host Giuliana Rancic and her husband Bill are opening an Italian restaurant in Chicago and have been making the press rounds. A reporter asked what Hollywood actress they would most like to feed, and she responded saying Leann:

‘She lost a lot of weight from all the stress in her life,’ she said. ‘She seems a little thin right now, and I think she looks great when she’s a bit curvier.’

Can we all just step back for a moment and talk about Giuliana Rancic calling someone else too thin? Giuliana SKIN AND BONES Rancic? The one who can’t have a baby, and her doctor keeps telling her to gain weight and she says she’s “gained 5 lbs and that it’s difficult.” Ummm, no. I could go to Olive Garden right now and gain 5 lbs before my entree even got there (holy shit, those breadsticks are good!) If you want a baby, you can gain weight. Giuliana has no room to talk! Leann was obviously not cool with her comment because she’s in denial, and she fired back on Twitter. She went the “nice bitch” route, where you can’t be like MAAAAN THAT WAS HARSH. But she’s obviously not happy. But she doesn’t own it enough to be a bitch. I hate that:

I’m actually Team Leann, here. But in all honesty, both of these ladies need to each some sandwiches and increase their daily food rations from 3 saltine crackers to at least 5, and add 3 cubes of cheese when they start feeling like they’re going to pass out.

3 responses

  1. I didn’t even notice the identical bikini; I was too busy noticing how LeAnn has basically morphed into Brandi. That Eddie Cibrian dude must be a real charmer to convince not one, but two women to starve themselves into twigs.

    August 31, 2011 at 4:24 AM

  2. guiliana can’t gain weight. that’s just how some people are naturally. not necessarily from being sick, they are just built that way genetically. me on the other hand, i could gain 5 pounds eating a salad. she can’t help that she can’t gain weight! to say ‘if you want a baby, you can gain weight’ is absolutely ignorant.

    December 10, 2012 at 7:17 PM

  3. Tbear

    Give me a break. Anyone can gain weight if you EAT! It’s simple math regardless of your metabolism. Unless you are hyperglycemic…..

    March 10, 2013 at 2:11 AM

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